Words from the Heart

Since my last post, I have had numerous encounters with friends and family suffering from various types of loss. It occurred to me that my post on grief might be continued or expanded at this time to cover what is "loss" and why do we grieve. Loss is, according to the dictionary, "fact of losing or state of having been lost; that which is lost; defeat." Perhaps it is my "cup-half-full" philosophy, but I see loss as more of a catalyst for change, than a defeat. Let me explain... Within the past few years, three of my immediate family died. (My Mom, Dad and Brother) The loss of these family members has been the catalyst for awareness of how precious our time together is for many members of my family, including myself. Since these deaths, my relationship with a surviving brother and sister-in-law and several of my cousins has become closer. It reminds me of the old Carter Family hymn, "Will the Circle be Unbroken," which talks about how difficult...

I was sitting at the computer, scanning the poems I wanted to include in a proposed manuscript when I suddenly found myself in tears. The poem I had just read tore open the flood gates that I had so expertly closed over a year ago when the first of three of my immediate family died. As quickly as I began to cry, I found my self laughing at the preposterous fact that here I was sobbing over a poem I wrote myself! As I reflected on the moment, I realized that I was finally allowing the process of grief to run its course. This was a natural and healthy reaction. It would be one that would repeat, but this was OK. There are hundreds of sites dedicated to helping people understand the grieving process. Most of them agree that there are five distinct stages : Denial and Isolation, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, and Acceptance No two people grieve at the same pace or experience all of the stages at the same time. It is imperative to understand that grief is a process, not a firm, solid,...